Can We Really Hate Our Spouse?

Can We Really Hate Our Spouse?

It is safe to say that each of us entered into married life believing that our love would last and the passion we felt would see us through any potential heartache and struggle. This is what makes it so humbling when we discover that we do indeed have the capacity, if...

The Dark Side Of Marriage

The Dark Side Of Marriage

Unless you're familiar with Dr. David Schnarch, you likely haven't heard about this dark side of married life. What follows is adapted from his work. There is a dark side in each one of us that is seldom discussed. An aspect of us that plays out in the shadows of...

A Marriage Fully Alive

A Marriage Fully Alive

If you missed the first parts of this series, click here for Part 1, and Part 2 In Alaska, there are mountain ranges around Denali where the weather and clouds are so thick that there are only twenty to thirty days a year where it is clear enough to see the peaks of...

A Passionate Marriage Is Created

A Passionate Marriage Is Created

Part one of this series can be found here. While standing in line at the store, you can feel the person right behind you. They are shifting back and forth and mumbling something inaudible under the breath. They are crowding your space in line as if by doing so the...

What Creates A Passionate Marriage?

What Creates A Passionate Marriage?

As the years pass and your marriage progresses, I am willing to bet that you are not in the same relationship from which you began. Oh you may still be with the one you originally married, but the relationship is not the same. It can't be. We constantly change and...

My Reads In 2022

My Reads In 2022

It was in grad school that I developed the need, then the love for reading (although now thanks to Audible, listening to books as well). Most all of them were good to great reads. A couple I didn't complete because I've finally gotten to the point where when I get to...

Welcome to Passionately Married

Welcome to Passionately Married

“Doing is never enough if you neglect Being. The ego knows nothing of Being but believes you will eventually be saved by doing. If you are in the grip of the ego, you believe that by doing more and more you will eventually accumulate enough 'doings' to make yourself...

Connection . . . or Idealized Togetherness?

Connection . . . or Idealized Togetherness?

What's one of the biggest obstacles to experiencing intimacy in your marriage? More often than not, the answer is unrealistic togetherness expectations, i.e., idealized or fantasy togetherness. I can hear the objections coming on loud and clear! Think through this...

Focus On The How

Focus On The How

What is it that creates the intensity in certain conversations with your spouse? What moves a conversation between two people from the issue at hand into personal meltdown - emotional reactivity? Emotional reactivity turns out to be nature's way of informing us of...

Keeping Your Cool

Keeping Your Cool

I know you've been there before, you're in the midst of an intense discussion with your spouse and it moves beyond a conversation about the issue at hand and gets personal. A button has been pushed, or you pushed their button and now it heats up even more. The...