*Note* This article is aimed specifically at the dads out there. The following tips, when enacted, will increase your romance with your wife.
Full-time mother, part-time mother, working mother, it doesn’t matter. Every mother needs help. Raising kids is tuff!
How many times have you settled down for the evening and gone to kiss your wife and she’s already asleep? Well, there goes any chance of physical romance.
Every day, moms go through a series of emotional roller coasters with your kids. One minute, the kids can be as cute as ever. In the next minute, one of them is screaming because the other one “invaded her space”.
Not only does a mom push through a chain of emotions every day, she also does all of the physical stuff that kids need. Lifting car seats in and out, changing clothes (and diapers), pushing shopping carts, and more.
By the end of the day, moms are tired!
Then comes the husband also wanting some attention and mom has to pull from her backup reserves and wait on him. Often times, those reserves just aren’t there.
So, dads, what can we do to help our wives and in turn, increase the romance in our marriages?
Here are 5 tips I’ve noticed really seem to do the trick:
1. Take the kids out on dates
Moms need time alone. One of the best ways to give mom some time alone is to take the kids off her hands for a while. This also helps develop your relationship with your kids. Daddy-daughter or father-son activities are key to their development. Also, for moms, there’s nothing better than seeing their loved ones all interacting together lovingly…from a distance.
2. Send Mom out on dates
Moms have friends too! Let mom hang out with her friends on a girl’s night out. This gives her a chance to get away from the cares of the house, the kids, and even you. In my experience, nothing helps mom feel more alive than getting out to mingle with her peers. And chances are good, that this tiny bit of time away from you will help her heart grow fond and you’ll reap the rewards when she gets home.
3. Help them with their chores
In many homes, it’s mom that gets stuck making sure the kids do their chores. Why not offer some help? It’s important for kids to do their chores to increase their work values, and it also helps to just plain keep the house in order. You’re the dad. The home is your responsibility too. Make sure the kids are doing their part. The best way to do this is to work alongside them. Raking leaves can usually turn into an awesome leaf fight and a treasured moment.
4. Help them with the bedtime stuff (also can be applied to morning time stuff)
Helping kids get to bed on time is a huge task. This is especially true for young kids. Rounding them up and making sure they’re getting their teeth brushed, going potty, and reading a story takes a lot of work. You can spare mom some of her highly prized energy and attention by helping with bedtime stuff. This also applies to getting started in the morning. There’s no better way to start the day than by helping out first thing in the morning
5. Be the boss
I’ve noticed many dads these days would rather be the “fun guy” than the bad guy. As a result, they leave it up to mom to be the disciplinarian. To increase your romance with your wife, you’ve got to work alongside her and help keep the kids in check. Many times, due to sheer physical intimidation, you can be a powerful force in getting the kids to conform. Also, make sure you’re always backing up what mom says. If she tells the kids to do something, consider it your duty to be the enforcer. Moms and dads that work together, grow together.
One bonus tip – Go on dates!
How about getting away together from the kids entirely? Many marriage experts say that a weekly date is almost mandatory to a successful and healthy marriage. This includes Friday night dates and also weekend get-a-ways together.
There’s a hidden benefit in all of this – helping mom also means being a better dad. As you grow your relationship with your wife by helping with the kids more, you’re simultaneously becoming a better dad. It’s a win-win!
In the end, it’s all about giving mom more. More time, more service, more love. As you do these things, you’ll find that love will be reflected back and yours will be a joyous, happy, and romantic marriage.
What about you? What are some things you’ve done (or your husband does) to help out?